Announcing! How 27 Days of Sex Changed Everything: New EBook

I'm Spilling it All in How 27 Days of Sex Changed Everything 

Spring is finally in the air where I live Holy crap that was the longest freaking winter I have ever lived through. My pipes are huge from shoveling. Sweet right? LOL

This winter I have also especially been living a hermit's life writing this seriously awesome eBook. Sort of the opposite of my normal running around fire fighter wife life.  I have missed everyone and I am super pumped to stick my neck out there, in more ways than one, into the spring light. This REALLY IS the perfect time to have a book release about the power of sex.

I am cracking up as I write this.

Not that this is a laughing matter, but in TWO days I am gong to be revealing more of myself to the world than I ever have. AND you guys know I share a lot here. When I get nervous I giggle. Like bad. Needless to say everything is making me giggle Don't you dare go on FB land and try to get me to laugh either, I can't take it!! My head is going to explode!!

So my lovely, lovely hotties you, I am REALLY going to need your support here. I swear I have been quiet for good reason. Hotties, don't fail me now!! ;)

If you have ever liked, shared, commented, or followed anything I have written, all of that work has lead to this crazy moment.

I just wanted to say THANK YOU SO MUCH for standing by me.

There were times when I felt like no one was listening except my Mom. And then I wondered if she even was. LOL. I know that 350 some odd FB fans may not seem like a ton to anyone. But I would rather have each and every one of you, then 300,00 fake ones. (Even if only 4% of you get my stuff Thank you FB and your fabulous rules. :) )
With out all of your words of encouragement, and pushing me to write and share more, there I no way I would have written this.

Here come the goods.

How 27 Days of Sex Changed Everything: Reigniting Your Love's Fire is a book where I bare my heart and soul, sharing my story.
I was depressed. Post partum. My hubby had just joined the fire department and was going through Fire Academy. Which meant a full time hours for that. We had just started an asphalt company after the failing car industry ate our finances. And our lunches. I had just had my second baby. We lost our house. Moved in next to family. We had no money. My hair was even falling out. I felt ugly. Alone. Exhausted. I joke here in this post that it was "The worst year of my life". Although it just wasn't funny at the time.
On top of that he was a super crabby mess from lack of sleep, high stress, no time at home, loads of work to do everywhere he went, and the pressure of passing classes tests.
I was also a crabby wreck.
I was spent.
The last thing I wanted to do was give it up.
Can I get an Amen to that if you have ever felt this way??
I was desperate for something to change for fear of losing him.

Since then I have seen huge things happen in my marriage, and the least I can say here, s that we are both much, MUCH happier.

If you desire and pray for a deep change in the intimacy in your marriage, this book might JUST be what sparks that fire back in you and your spouse.
This book is among a series of eBook written for FireFighterWife.com called
The Fire Wife Academy. See the sweet things she says about the book being released here. <3

 If you remember I had the huge honor of helping with the first one The End Of Worry Fear and Sleepless Nights. It has helped so many of my sister become stronger, I was super pumped to share my 27 Days Challenge to fire up love lives. My number one mission is to help strengthen fire marriages out there, and putting myself out on a limb (and Faith) seems like a total logical way to do just that. Who better to ask than a firefighter wife right?
I hope you feel that fire too!

How 27 Days will be available April 11th through Fire Fighter Wife.

So share with your friends everywhere who might be in slumps too. Who doesn't need some fire in their bedroom right?
Again, THANK YOU for being you!
I adore you!
AS always I'll be at my HFCG's Face Book page and in the Fire FIghter Wife Page. Though I usually hang out in the secret one you have to be a member of so we can get real. :) Give a shout out ether way and tell me what you think!

Midnight Delight

 In a previous blog I laid out my Surrendered Wife attack to save my marriage. Some questions have arose out of that... mainly how and when did I find the time and energy to do it 27 days in a row? Well, I wish I had an exciting answer for you. That one day I woke up an early riser, having no problem waking up. Or even that suddenly my kids turned to angels and went to bed easy and early giving me the time. No it was more like this, I made a decision, then my life got harder. Every thing possible happened that would ruin the normal time... that I would take advantage of the kids being asleep. The kids would stay up being colicky or with a nightmare till midnight. My hubby would have to go on a fire or medical call. Even my dog probably ran away.
  Determined to accomplish my goal, I was willing to do whatever it took. At first, and I still have to overcome this sometimes, I was just not in the mood. Whether my love tank was just way below empty because he had just started training to be a firefighter, started a company, was so stressed out he hardly was himself, and if I did see him before eleven that day, he was so tired he would fall asleep telling me about his day. Possibly, because I felt like a cow, breastfeeding every hour- those things also didn't want to be touched. I was also drained from having a newborn and an 18 month old, trying to keep a military clean house. Which is ridiculous considering when I was little my favorite game was to go behind my mom and pull out all the clothes she had just folded and put away. So yes it was in my personality to be messy and not really care, but also I was reaping those seeds I planted with two very crazy messy boys at home, making it difficult to get any thingdone.
  Night time was stressful. As I am writing this, my now four and five year old, are listening to me narrate as I write, trying to entertain them while I blog. My five year old said, "Yeah, they sure are!" Oh my gosh, how funny! So I would beg my husband some nights, "Is it OK if we do it in the morning? I am just too tired. On those nights I would ask myself, what do I want more?  Intimacy, or an hour sleep? My body would say.. um F that!! An hour sleep. Some nights I could talk myself out of it. On the nights when I literally was falling asleep while I brushed my teeth I found a simple solution. You see I knew if I risked waiting till the morning the kids may wake up early that day, or even he may get a call. Then I would risk that devastating circle all over again. Resulting in crabby pants husband and me feeling like crap. So I had an idea.
  Ever heard of an Afternoon Delight? Well this is my version, Midnight Delight. I started setting the alarm on my phone for in the middle of our sleep schedule, about four am. I usually woke up anyway in the middle of the night, so I figured why the heck not. It would guarantee my a spot in his schedule, that I knew I would always have. Normally, I would be more rested, just having a few hour nap, if I didn't have stop to breastfeed sometime in there, that is. It was also uplifting to my spirit that I was going to be able to go back to sleep afterwards.
  I started to really try and make our time count that we did spend together, giving him opportunities to fill my love tank. What I mean by that is love me in the way I needed him to. In the book the Five Love Languages, it talks more about this. So, I would make sure the kids were in bed asleep, a couple times a week, even if it meant we singing and rocking those toddlers. The house would be clean, to his standards, not mine. His language, is acts of service, which meant a clean house was equal to sport scar for Christmas. My personality is Sanguine, which also means that the last thing I want to do, ever, is clean the house. That there is always tomorrow for that stuff, because today is meant for fun. His personality is Melancholy, meaning he sees dirt that isn't even there because he is so detail oriented and driven. You can only imagine what disasters this leads too! Anyway, I would try my hardest to have it all set up for a perfect peaceful night. It wasn't perfect every time, but what he saw was me trying to help. Putting forth a huge effort and having no idea why. He would ask and I'd say, thanks for noticing, but that was all. After the first month was up, I finally told him about my plan. Of course he got all red, blushing, and said, Well, will you hug your friend who gave you that book or me? That was an amazing moment in my journey to victory.
 It was a hard and long (ha ha) process, but I am so glad I made that decision. We are closer each day. He is my best friend. I thank God for him every day, for giving im to me and for protecting him. Love you babe.
 Let's get those comments going! You will feel sexy after! :)  How many days staright have you made it? Have you had any crazy personality stories? Feel free to share. If it is too personal of a question go ahead and email me.

The Worst Year of My Life

  Well, you would think the year that your husband decided to become a man in uniform, to serve others, and to become the ultimate cool of all the heroes, a firefighter, that year would be pretty awesome. You would want to put a cheerleader outfit on, stand up and tell the world, this is my husband! I get to be married to this man!! Look over here!! Maybe if you were a sane person. Maybe if you had a sane life. Or maybe if you weren't obesely pregnant. Even, maybe if five things were going our way, I may have twirled a pom pom. Probably not though, because cheerleaders made fun of me in high school. So I secretly always wished to burn them... :) lol
  Ten years ago my husband and I got hitched. Four years or so later we joined an Amway team. Up to that point our marriage was fine, but we were always struggling to be fine. We looked like the perfect couple on the outside but there was a bad seed growing. Corporate America. he part owned an car detailing and customizing shop and I in retail. Sadly, I competed with him in everything. Who's job was worse, who had the worst boss, who had the toughest time, equaling who was stronger. Who could take it. Our friends would even come over to hear who would win that day's game of worst day ever. Who does that?  Sounds like a super supportive group of buddies there. Thanks to this image I had gotten of what a career woman acts and treats her man like from American society, TV,  and the women I grew up around at my high pressure retail job, I was screwed up. Thank God we joined Amway at the exact time we did.
  A miracle happened. When we joined this group, I didn't know the first thing about owning a business. My husband did, and of course I couldn't let him be a better business owner than me, so I read every book my mentor would lend me. Then when she didn't have enough, I started ordering them, and started searching for more of them. Some were leadership books, some helped you relate, some in relationships. I probably read  twenty books that first year. A huge accomlishment, considering I hadn't touched a book since high school. At least one that wasn't an art book full of paintings or a Cosmo.
  Some were revolutionary. Others I read, I wanted to throw at the wall. There was one particular one that made me so mad, I wanted to throw it in a fire and make s'mores. (Surrendered Wife) My life as an independent career sales women, I had convinced everyone, even myself, fitted me. It was something I could be proud of, people said. I got to dress up in a nice suit, pay my bills, have a nice car, go out to eat, travel... what more could a girl want, right?
  An ember inside me started to burn. My heart would pound as I read parts of them. Something was happening, I was coming back to life. The artist, the singer, the creative, happy encouraging wife I used to be. Let me tell you this took a TON of hard work. I had to do things I did not want to do, that I hated doing, for the love and sake of my marriage, without telling him I was changing. Now not a month, not six months, not a year. I am talking a two year, actually till this day, on going project. You see my sweet darling, the key is that the project is on me. My marriage and kids deserve it. Plus I deserve it. I deserve to have this wonderful love I had always dreamed of growing up. So I sucked it up and changed for the better. Many many, many things... nothing that had to do with who I was or what I stood for, but little things. It is always the littlest things that are hard.
  Now, I know you are wondering, what does this have to do with your hubby becoming a fireman?  Longer story short, he had been unjustly pushed out of the customizing shop by the boss' when I was nine months pregers with my first. Within months, we found ourselves behind. No income for a few months tends to do that. When my first was 9 months old, I found out I was pregnant again. We decided I was going to be a stay at home mom after we found out, no matter what it took.  Micah knew he had to change what we were doing to make money. Our house was going to be foreclosed on December 24th, Christmas Eve. Plus, I was due in a May with our second boy. The only thing I could think to do was pray. Pray and believe this was all going to work out. That things would get easier. Well, miracle, after disguised miracle started to happen. Micah's Granny move out of her house and asks us if we would like to live here. Right next to his parents, across the lake form mine, directly on the lake... amazing.  Then the opportunity to own a business basically falls in his lap. Me, being such a supportive wife, say, go for it babe! Then you know what happens?! He decides that he also feels called to check out being a firefighter! So let me get this straight, we are going to have 2 newborns and your aren't going to be around, like, at all? What do I say? Sure babe! Go for it... because remember, now I am the perfect wife who supports her hubby in everything.
  Before you put a halo on me, give me one second. One day, our group of guy friends decide to get together to play football. Resulting in Micah having two fractured disks, and unable to bend his ankle. Can you believe this, I am so ashamed, (head sinking) I... was relieved. Of course not happy that he was in pain, but that this would ruin his chance of being a fireman. Nice, perfect supporting wife I am, huh? Here you thought I was an angel. No. It only gets worse. Of course, about the same time, we hear about a church that had experienced some healings. Again, I thought of myself, with all of my allergies,  go and pray. Well, now guess what flipping happens?! Micah get healed. Completely. His back is fine and his foot that they said would never be able to point up moves all over just fine. Very funny, I think, very funny. Again, I am very excited he is healed, but was hoping he would have forgot about the firefighting. Of course not. He is ecstatic. I never let him know that I was bummed. One thing I didn't mess up on was I always encouraging.
  Is that not the worst thing you have ever heard? I am so glad, I made it through that. I had to decide, if I was meant to be with my husband, God picked him out for me. We were created to be together, which also meant that we could not do anything without one another. If that were true, I had to trust where God was leading my husband. That he needed me, just as much as I needed him. Also that if I thought I had changed a lot up until this point and I still wasn't happy, I still had some changing to do. Let me say this loud and clear, you can  not change your spouse. I wasn't even doing it on purpose. He wasn't the problem, we were just broke and this is what he was doing to fix it. Even more importantly, you can not steal their dreams. They will resent you forever. I have heard that hell would be meeting the person you were meant to be. I would hate to have that be my fault.
  Yes, the worst year of my life was not my husband's fault. It wasn't the fact that I had just had a c section, a colicky newborn that I couldn't put down, an 18 month old I couldn't pick up but was still in a crib, and a husband that couldn't help because of his back. Nor the fact that when he finally could help, he ran away to have fun at the fire dept, or hunt in the woods. No, it was because I neglected myself. I needed to give myself more attention. So that, I in fact, wouldn't create these walls. Then, I wouldn't have the need to feel bigger or better than my husband, the person God created to be with me through my whole life. I needed to find ways that I could be happier on my own, without the need for someone else to be the source of that love. That way I could love my husband the way he deserved and needed to be. Now I know of only one way.
  Looking back at that time in our life, though it was only four years away, it seems like a life time ago, but  just like yesterday. Time is so funny like that. Thankfully I came with a plan of attack to fix myself from a couple of the books I had read... Boy do I mean attack. Wait till you hear what happens. It is definitely for adult readers only so be warned. Till tomorrow! Good night all